Hard Feelings
by SpeedingCars8
Summary: It was only one hour ago. It was all so different then. There's nothing yet that's really sunk in. Looks like it always did. Some Slash. COMPLETE
1. Just A Little More Poison

**A/N: This is my first fanfiction story, so please, please review it and give me some suggestions because I definitely need them (I'm picky, so I'd love for you to point out spelling errors)! I hope the story isn't too bad, I know I need some practice before I get good at writing this type of fiction. Since my main character is Summer, I tried to make her dialogue sound as if it were in character. Hope you like it :o)**

* * *

**Just A Little More Poison**

"Are you sure about this Coop?" I asked, surprised by the offer.

"Sum, why wouldn't I let you stay here? I mean, I'm not going to be here for a couple weeks, and I can definitely understand not wanting to be around our parents when they're together." We both shuddered.

"Alright, but how much is the rent? Because if you're not here, you shouldn't have to pay for it if I'm living here." I've never worried about money before because my Dad has always paid for everything.

"Well, not too much because you have to pay your own water and electric bill. I mean Trey didn't have to pay anything at all because he fixed up the place himself. The landlord takes it pretty easy on you. Just try not to get behind. I'll kill you if I get evicted," she warned me jokingly.

"Well I have such great plumbing skills. I guess this means I have to actually get a job, huh?" Marissa laughed at me.

"You can move your stuff in as soon as Ryan and I are done packing."

"Great, so after you move your fifty bags of luggage, I can move in next year, right?" Coop grinned and rolled her eyes at me.

"I'm gonna be so bored while you guys are gone. Too bad Cohen turned evil. I'd go if it wouldn't be so awkward. Assface. We'll have to just hang out when you get back. But I hope you have fun anyway. And no OD'ing Coop, I don't want to have to kidnap you from the hospital again!"

By this time she was rushing back through the front door to lift another of her like billion bags of crap she just has to have with her when she's only going to be gone for a couple weeks. Trying to impress the greasy Mexicans are we?

She continued to walk back and forth. "Oh, and if you need some company Chris is in town visiting. He decided that since he works here anyway, he'll stay out of Chino for a while. Before we knew you were staying here, we were going to pay him a little to house sit for us while we're gone."

"Is he still going to stop by?" I asked suspiciously.

"Probably, just to check up on everything. Hopefully Ryan will call him later to let him know you're staying here. I mean, he's just like Ryan so I think you guys will get along great if you run into each other. Maybe he'll hook you up with a job for now too."

Great. Well, I did sort of want Ryan 'til Luke said he was from Chino.

"Kay Coop." I forced a smile.

"Sum, promise me you'll hang out with Chris?"

Well, maybe it'll be nice spending some time away from neurotic Cohen.

"Promise."

* * *

I opened the trunk and grabbed my heavy ass luggage. Just as bad as Coop. I went inside and just rolled it up next to the bed. 

As I stood there, I quickly scanned the sheets. Okay, normally I wouldn't have a problem sleeping in my best friend's bed, but it's a little different now that Chino's been joining her. Um, ew. There better not be pubes in here. I gagged and tried not to think about it.

I remembered I should hurry and unpack. I want to make myself at home before Chris shows up. I don't know if I'm comfortable with this but at least he's not living here or anything. Besides, I promised Coop that I'd hang out with him at least once.

I finally finished my full invasion of Marissa's bedroom and plopped onto the bed. All that physical moving stuff that I've never done before really tired me out. I shook my head at how pathetic I am.

* * *

I stepped out of the shower the next morning and heard the phone ringing. I squeezed out my hair and threw a towel around me running out of the bathroom, down the hall, to the nightstand, whacked my knee on it, and picked up, trying not to swear. Who the hell has furniture this pointy?

"Hi, you must be Summer," a young male voice said politely on the other line.

"Hi, is this Chris?"

"Yep, are you all moved in yet?" he asked, making small talk.

I immediately said yes, to avoid him offering any help.

I felt a little awkward. I'm not used to talking to guys on the phone except for Cohen. Wait, so yeah, I'm not used to talking to _guys_ on the phone.

"Mind if I stop by? Ryan insisted that I meet you some time."

"Sure, just give me a few, so I can finish getting ready," I said, sounding as if I were really interested.

"Alright, cool. I'll be there in 20."

_Woohoo._

I hung up and looked down at the floor noticing that I left a big wet spot in the rug. Looks kind of like a pee stain. I moved my empty luggage thingy over on top of it. There. Good Enough.

I tiptoed back to the bathroom to dry off then went into the closet to pick something out. Yeah, I can't decide what to wear. Well I better hurry, or he'll get here and I'll be wearing nothing. That'd be just great!

Just after I finished getting ready, I heard a knock on the door. Ah crap, I don't even have any food or soda to offer him. Anyway, I opened the door and greeted him with the biggest fakest smile ever.

"Hi Summer, I'm Chris," he said holding out his hand.

"Hi, come in!" I shook his hand. Crap, I forgot my anti-Chino hand sanitizer.

He walked in and I motioned for him to sit on the couch. I didn't know whether or not to turn on the TV. Guess this means I have to actually have a conversation with it. I mean him.

He didn't sit down. He hesitated a little and looked down the hallway toward the bedroom and the bathroom.

"It's a nice place."

"Yeah, too bad I get kicked out in a couple weeks," I said laughing.

"Yeah, too bad, huh," he said smiling at me.

_Ok look away, look away…_

_Yeah, he's kind of cute. Ok, that's enough._

"So how about we go out tonight or something?" His eyes got wider and he shrugged like he assumed he'd get turned down.

"Um—uh—sure, uh…"

"Well, uh, I mean, if you don't want to…"

"Yeah, sure, what did you have in mind?"

"Well, do you drink, I mean, we could go down to The Baitshop tonight and hang out. They've got Jet live and my buddies got me a couple tickets."

_Oh no, I shouldn't be going out drinking again. Coop has really rubbed off on me. But I promised her. Well it's Jet, I love Jet. I'd probably go with a hobo if he had tickets._

"Sounds great."

"Cool, I'll pick you up around 7."

"Okay," I said smiling. "See ya then."

"I'll call you when I'm on my way," he said as he walked out the door to his car waving goodbye.

This should be interesting.

* * *

So here I am, going out tonight with a guy that I'm not even trying to impress and it's taking me forever just to get dressed. I stood in the doorway of the closet shuffling through the shirts, then through the skirts and jeans. 

Okay, this is getting ridiculous. Time to make a decision. I pulled out a bus-yellow shirt that had slits down the right side under my arm, going down to my hip and the left side bunched up showing most of my stomach. The shirt had custom designed black paint smudges splashing across it, with scattered studs. Wow, I look like such a crackhead when I wear this shirt. He'll love it.

Then I just closed my eyes and grabbed whatever skirt my hand reached first. I slipped it on and it was a mini with ripped spots and a chain that went from the left front belt loop to the back. I think this is good enough for someone from Chino.

I jumped when the phone rang, stabbing myself with an eye pencil. I picked it up and guess who.

"Hey, are you ready?"

"Yeah, just about, I just need a minute to clean this…" I trailed off.

"Okay, good, 'cause I kind of forgot to call you until I pulled onto your street," he said through his laughter.

"Ah! Okay, almost done, I'll hurry out as soon as I can."

"Take your time."

I ran across the room, threw on these whorish looking black heels. Wait, these are Coops. That figures. Maybe she won't notice.

I locked up and hopped into the jeep trying not to ruin my hair on the way in. I kept blinking 'cause my eyes were all watery from way too much black makeup.

"You look good."

I felt my cheeks get warm. "Thanks." I continued to look out my window taking a guess at what shade of pink I'd already turned.

We chatted a little bit on the way, only a 15 minute drive.

I finally started to get a little more comfortable around Chris. He did remind me a lot of Ryan.

* * *

When we were riding on the highway, Chris was in the fast lane. I could see the meter from where I was sitting but he had to have been going 90. It was really windy so we could hardly hear each other talking at that point. He turned up the radio. I tend to get car sick easily so I stared straight ahead instead of to the side, so I didn't watch the road pass by. I started spacing out listening to the song on the radio. 

_No time for goodbye he said as he faded away  
__Don't put your life in someone's hands  
__They're bound to steal it away  
__Don't hide your mistakes 'cause they'll find you, burn you  
__Then he said  
__If you wanna get out alive  
__run for your life  
__If you wanna get out alive  
__run for your life…_

Oh what a happy song. He looked over at me and reached to changed the station. Pretty much all of the stations had advertisements on so he turned it back down as we got of the exit.

Time was going by fast, before I knew it, we were inside the Baitshop, music blasting. I wish we had backstage passes.

So we headed towards the bar and Chris pulled out my stool for me before he sat down. Alex walked over to us.

"Hi…" She gave me a weird look, like what the hell are you doing here with that strange guy?

"Hey how ya doin'?" Chris said, staring at her a little.

Alex put on her bitch disguise like usual, so Chris stopped looking at her. It's so funny how she can make guys afraid of her.

"What would you like tonight?"

"How about we start off with a few spearmint Schnapps…" Chris started raffling off all these 100 proof shots. My eyes widened, remembering I really shouldn't be drinking heavily tonight.

In about a minute, Alex walked back over with a bunch of shots, and Chris kept pushing them toward me laughing as I choked them all down.

With each shot, I got a little goofier and the world looked so much more attractive.

He drank only about half the number of shots I took…maybe 5 or 6, my tolerance is way too high now.

The hours passed by quickly as we had more fun talking non-stop about everything. I think I might have told him my life story. I don't remember. I don't care, as long as I wasn't babbling about Cohen all night long.

Chris started talking to Alex about any positions available and she offered me a job cleaning around and just managing everything on concert nights, just for a temporary thing to pay the rent. I was so excited and so, so very drunk that I stood up, wobbling a bit and gave Chris a big hug. I guess he was good for something.

Eventually, I don't know exactly when, Alex started bringing us beer. I was guzzling it down so fast. I think it might have been Corona. Tastes like pee. And speaking of pee, I had to go take care of that.

"I have to go use the bathroom." I said sort of falling off my barstool.

"Alright, hurry though; you don't want to miss the last few songs of the concert."

"I know. I'll be back in a minute, hold my purse for a sec."

"I rushed to the bathroom and eventually pushed my way back through the crowd to the bar."

"Welcome back," he smiled.

"Yeah," I burped and covered my mouth laughing. Idiot.

I drank a couple more beers and just sat there and watched the band a bit, as Alex kept glancing over at me and Chris all protectively like she was suspicious about something. My stomach started to hurt so I had to stop drinking for a while. And to think, I didn't even plan on drinking hardly anything.

By this time my balance completely sucked, and I got tired of trying to sit up straight on the stool so I leaned on Chris's side and just rested my cheek on his shoulder. I kept looking in the direction of the stage, pretending I still had a clear view of the band. I listened to the echoey sound. I wondered if it was that echoey to everyone else too. I'm so drunk.

_Well I've been thinking about the future  
__Too young to pretend  
__It's such a waste to always look behind you  
__You should be looking straight ahead  
__Guess I'm gonna have to move on  
__Before we meet again…_

Oh god ew, another reminder of whats-his-name. I lifted my head off Chris's shoulder quickly to finish the last third of one of my beers in only a few gulps.

When I turned my head away from the stage to put my head back down, Chris was looking right in my eyes.

I didn't know what to do. "Hi." How mature. I laughed at myself on the inside.

Our faces were almost touching, he was so close. I felt a hand go from my shoulder to my hand and another hand slid down my left ribs to my hip and onto the bottom of my back. I felt my face get really warm again and I got nervous, but it felt good. He started squeezing me toward him a little and moved in for a kiss. He barely touched my lips at all and my eyes wouldn't stay open. When his lips left mine, I whispered, "…Did you want to …um…when you bring me home…did you want to stay..?" "Yeah, sounds like a good idea," he whispered back.

All of a sudden I felt a knot in my stomach. Is this guilt? I'm SO not cheating on Cohen, he's the one that dumped ME! I should go through with this, Chris is a great guy, and he likes me. This is my chance to move on.

I felt my stomach jump, and the blood was rushing to my head, making me feel nauseous. Maybe I shouldn't have him over if I'm going to end up puking all over him or something.

"Can I change my mind?" I said, my face all twisted from sickness.

"No, you're not allowed to…" he laughed and nodded.

Phew. Vomit would so ruin this date.

* * *

So the concert finally ended, the place cleared out in an instant, and he held my arm as I slowly walked back to the jeep. Thank God we parked so close! 

I pretty much just fell in and put my seatbelt on, and he closed my door for me and hopped in the driver's seat.

I was getting ridiculously tired, I could barely keep my eyes open, and my body was tired too. I knew I shouldn't have had so much to drink again. I have to stop doing that.

* * *

The ride home was a little blurry because I was passed out half the time, I didn't hear the radio playing at all, I'm sure we had enough music anyway. All I could hear was the wind passing by my right ear from the car window on the highway, with the breeze cooling my face which was burning up. 

He pulled into the drive way, and he offered to help me inside since I was kind of mopey. I was completely obliterated. This may be the drunkest I have ever been. I've had more to drink than this though, that's the confusing thing. I've never felt this sick either. Maybe a little sleep will help

I don't remember him helping me inside, just to the door. He took my keys out of my purse for me and he was holding me up. Everything darkened and I lost all control of my body.

* * *

I woke up around 5 a.m. in a cold sweat. Wow, I've never woken up this early without reason. I shivered and motioned to get up and turn the fan off. My entire body was soaked so I slowly peeled the sheets away from my legs. Must have had another stupid nightmare or something. 

I figured there's no use going back to sleep if I just have to go to work in a few hours anyway. Alex is making me clean up after the concert. So I sat up slowly using all the effort I had. Ouch. My arm was throbbing almost as hard as my head. Definitely shouldn't have had so much to drink last night. Well, I say that all the time. As I stood up to reach for the chain, I caught a glimpse of my left hand and noticed fresh blood dripping from my fingertips past my wrist.

_It was only one hour ago  
__It was all so different then  
__There's nothing yet that's really sunk in  
__Looks like it always did._

I stood there dazed and confused. I was so tired that I thought I was still dreaming or something. Finally, I made my way to the bathroom to clean myself up. The sight of blood makes me dizzy. What the hell happened to me?

_You left your open drink on the counter when you went to the bathroom._

I flicked the light switch on the wall next to me and glanced forward at the sliding glass mirror. I blinked a few times and rubbed my cloudy eyes. I jumped a little when I looked at a reflection that couldn't have been mine.

There stood a girl, she was frail, looked so sick with long, dark brown, sticky hair, mascara smeared down across her cheeks. There were grayish brown rings around her eyes and her bottom lip was split open and swollen, and a painful looking trail of purple spots and lines stretched from her neck all the way down to her elbows.

_You weren't allowed to change your mind._

Was I still sleeping? Why hasn't my alarm gone off yet? I'm going to be late for work again.

My legs started shaking as I continued staring at the mirror. My knees started to buckle. Then it hit me.

_There's flesh and bone  
__It's just the way that you were tied in  
__Now there's no one home  
__I grieve for you

* * *

-Flashback- _

I slowly woke up from a blur, lying on my back, starting to feel my body rocking back and forth. Ugh, I'm going to get motion sickness. I tried to move my legs and nothing happened. What the hell? I wiggled my toes a little and the tingle traveled up my legs as I started to regain feeling in them. My head was pounding and I felt really stiff. I opened my eyes to see nothing but shadow, then I realized someone must have been hovering over me. I tried to see a face, but I could barely see or even think. I tried to move my head—nothing.

Gross. I can taste beer. Great, I must have drunk a lot, since I only drink beer once I can't taste anything anyway. Why do I always do that?

Ouch. Pain shot down my legs, up my back and low in my stomach. OW! I still didn't know what was happening. I tried to push out, "what's going on?" but only air came out. I kept trying. I still couldn't see straight but tried to focus my eyes. It was way too dark to make anything out.

Still trying to speak, all I did was gurgle a little, tasting heartburn from the alcohol. A familiar face looked down at me really quickly. It took me a minute to figure it out. CHRIS.

"What are you doing!" I gasped repeatedly trying to take in enough air to speak.

"Stop! Get off of me! What do you think you're doing!"

"Oh don't be such a baby," he rolled his eyes at the interruption.

"Stop! Please stop," I cried.

"No, it's too late. It was your idea anyway, don't you remember?" He looked frustrated for a minute then started slamming even harder.

The pain got worse as I got less numb. All I could hear were the echoes of my own screams and the bedroom windows rattling. I felt like someone was holding me under water.

I continued to scream as loud as I could and started to kick my legs around. I couldn't move my arms because his hands were pressing them into the mattress and the springs kept pinching me.

"Stop moving around! You're making this harder than it has to be!" he screamed at me, annoyed.

I gathered all the strength in me to stretch forward. I bit underneath his left shoulder as hard as I could, tasting salt and blood. I heard him yelp, and his hands lifted off my arms for a brief second, giving me a little time to try to drag myself out from under him.

I grabbed the wood frame on the right side of the bed and pulled. I didn't get very far. I was still screaming at this point. When he tried to cover my mouth, he smashed my face with anger. I kept pulling away but he didn't stop or get off of me. All I could do was keep moving, keep pulling myself away as much as I could. I couldn't give up.

But the more I moved, the more anger built up inside him. I felt another blow to my temple. Then it all went black.

-End Flashback-

* * *

As I lost strength in my legs, I gripped the edges of the sink, hunching over it as the room spun around me. Is this the alcohol? This can't be the alcohol. I'm not used to this. 

_Did this really just happen to me?_

I couldn't hold myself up any longer so I just tumbled to the floor. The landing shot through every limb.

_It's so hard to move on  
__Still loving what's gone  
__They say life carries on  
__Let it out and move on  
__Missing what's gone  
__They say life carries on_

After a minute of heavy breathing and room spinning, I pushed myself up off the cold tiles of the bathroom floor, holding my head in my hands, resting my arms on the toilet seat. The pain twisted in my stomach as it tried to jump out my throat. Everything went numb again. No, no, no, I hate motion sickness. I toppled over backwards.

* * *

**A/N: I am doing a part 2 to this story because of the way I ended it. Let me know if a part 2 is even worth it.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own The OC or any of its characters. I do own Chris. The songs are "Get Out Alive" by Three Days Grace, "Move On" by Jet and "I Grieve" by Peter Gabriel. They own their songs.**


	2. Flesh And Bone

**A/N: I decided to make this story into a chapter story rather than a oneshot. I would love for everyone to review every chapter and give me suggestions about how I can improve the story or the way I write. Please point out any spelling errors. Thanks! I hope you like it:o) Also, I may continue to change the POV depending on where I go with the story.**

* * *

**Flesh and Bone**

**-Alex-**

Last night at work I was serving drinks to Seth's girlfriend. Well I guess they broke up because she was with some other guy that I've never seen before. She seemed to be drinking a lot. Sort of like what happened to that girl Lindsay, when Ryan came in and yelled at Marissa for it. Only Marissa wasn't here. Her only influence was that guy she was with.

But she was sitting there laughing and joking with the guy; he didn't look like he was from Newport, that's for sure. He was a little shady, I'm not sure that he was trustworthy. So I kept glancing over to see what was up every once in a while, and almost every time I did, she caught me looking at them.

Well, I heard from Marissa the other day that Summer was staying at their apartment; actually, the one I used to live in with Marissa. So I was going to stop by to see how she was doing. Ya know, make sure she was still alive after drinking so much. But it was real late when I got out of work and I was tired so I decided to go home and sleep a little.

* * *

In the morning I drove over to the place, and knocked on the door and no one answered. Her car was in the driveway so I knew she'd been home. I kept knocking, but no one answered, I didn't hear a thing either. At first I thought maybe that guy had spent the night with her. I wouldn't have been surprised because they were pretty cozy at the Baitshop. 

After standing on the steps at the door for five minutes I was ready to give up and walk back to the car when I saw a car pull up and that guy she was with last night stood up out of it. I got really confused. He gave me a look like I wasn't allowed to be there.

"Hi," he paused, "How ya doin? What are you doing here?" he said with a nervous tone.

"Hi, I'm good, I'm just dropping by to see how Summer's doing," I snapped.

Well I got tired of knocking, I was worried that she might not be okay so I turned to open the door, and sure enough, it was unlocked!

"Oh, wow, why is this unlock-" I turned and he wasn't standing there anymore, and the car screeched away.

"What the hell," I mumbled, confused.

So I slowly walked into the living room repeating Summer's name, not too loud in case she was still in her drunken sleep. I walked straight down the hall to where my bedroom used to be but she wasn't in bed. Then I thought she might be in the bathroom or something.

So I walked to the bathroom and the door was open, the light was on.

_Gasp _

_Oh god, oh god, why is there blood on the floor!_

I opened the door further and slowly followed the trail of red drips with my eyes over to the floor next to the toilet, and there lay Summer on her back. Her entire body looked gray and she was bruised all over, but her face and the side of her head was still bleeding.

I stood there shaking, my heart feeling like it would burst right out of my chest. I had no idea what to do. Finally I shook my head looking around, then ran to the phone down the hall and called 911.

An ambulance was on its way, and I ran back over to her and kneeled on the floor trying to wake her up. She made moaning noises and only breathed lightly. Thank God, I really thought she was dead.

I stayed there on the floor with her holding her head up to see if the bleeding would stop, trying to get her to respond to what I was saying. In just a couple minutes, I heard blaring sirens. I heard three men open the door and run in so I stood up and stepped aside, blood soaked into the knees of my jeans.

Then more sirens. Maybe the police.

"Ma'am I'm going to need your name, phone number and address and we need know what happened," the officer demanded, giving me an accusing look.

"My name is Alex Kelly, 153-6849, and I found her like this when I came to visit," I said hardly even able to speak through my nerves and tears.

"She's unconscious now and her pulse count is decreasing! Someone get the stretcher so we can hook her up to the IV!" I heard one of the EMT's yell at another.

I saw Summer, with a thick white bandage wrapped around her head and a sheet covering her almost naked body, being carried outside to the ambulance in a stretcher. She looked like dead weight, not moving at all.

Without asking, I quickly jumped into the back of the ambulance and sat on the bench next to the stretcher. All the way to the hospital, I thought of what may have happened last night when Summer left with Chris after having so much to drink at the concert.

* * *

We arrived at the hospital and as they brought her into the intensive care room, full of machines and beeping, I tried to follow and watch, but one of the nurses said, "I'm sorry ma'am, family only." 

Instead of screaming and crying about it, I thought quickly, and lied that I was her cousin. So glad they didn't know that I don't even remember Summer's last name.

So I sat in there in the corner of the room just watching a dozen doctors moving all around her, in their blue gowns and masks covering their faces. Just the sight of this makes me sick, being in a hospital and all.

Then these two women in white clothing walked in with things that looked like black tackle boxes and a briefcase.

"We should do this now, while she's asleep so she's not further traumatized by the examination of her condition," one of the women whispered, scanning me briefly.

I sat there curious as to what they were there for. As soon as they opened their boxes, I knew what they were doing.

The first women pulled out a small brown paper bag, an envelope, a cotton swab, tweezers, and a tiny zip-lock baggie.

I leaned forward resting my forehead in my hands, with my elbows on my thighs. They're right, this is better while she's asleep.

As I was watching the two women poke and prod and stick things in places they really don't belong, another nurse asked my name and insisted that I hold Summer's left hand to get the blood moving, so they could do a blood test.

So I stood there rubbing her hand; she was ice cold, and made me shiver. I watched the color come back into parts of her lower arm then was disturbed by the site of the needle puncturing deep into the other side of her elbow. I almost gagged a little when I saw the syringe suck the blood out of her for about a minute. As if she hasn't lost enough of that stuff already.

The two women in the white clothing finally covered her lower area back up with the hospital gown and mumbled information back and forth as they left the room. Then the doctor came back in and started lifting her limbs to look at her cuts and bruises. I listened to the conversations, there were so many between the nurses and doctors and police officers and medical examiners and all I got out of it was "Finger bruises… Rohypnol… temporary paralysis…" I almost shit myself. How did I not notice what was going on. I was watching the guy like a hawk all night. I didn't even see him slip anything into her drink while she was in the bathroom. My body was pulsing with anger at myself for not saving her sooner.

* * *

**Disclaimer: I do not own The OC or any of its characters. I do own Chris.**

* * *


	3. Dead Wrong

**A/N: I'm not sure how many chapters will be in this story, which affects whether or not there will be a sequel. There will be more characters involved as the story progresses, but if you review, you can request any character to be a part of it. The only characters I cannot involve, due to the time period and plot of the story are Caleb, Hailey, Jimmy, Lindsay, Zach, and Volchok. However, this may change, depending on how the story goes.**

* * *

**Dead Wrong**

-Summer-

I opened my eyes and blinked the blur away, and a man lifted the oxygen mask off my face. Alex was the first person I recognized that was actually there for me, watching to make sure I was okay.

"How are you feeling?"

"I can't really feel that much…"

"They gave you lots of medicine because even though you slipped into a coma, you were still in pain, which showed on the EKG," she said, her eyes all red and tired.

"How long have I been here?"

"About two days," she said. My eyes got wide.

"You weren't here the entire time, were you?" I asked feeling ashamed for wasting her time.

"Actually I did. But I got a couple hours of sleep and had some time to go to the cafeteria for lunch today," she said, making me not feel quite as guilty.

I felt stupid for not being able to sort my thoughts about why I was here. "Alex…I have a question…"

"Sure?" she said listening closely.

"What am I doing here?"

She blinked a few times and sighed looking at the floor. Before she spoke at all, the doctor walked back into the room and stood next to my bed.

"Ms. Roberts. How's that medicine wearing off?"

"It's not really…"

"Okay, we have some things to sort out, so I'll come back when you're a little more grounded."

"Okay then," I said quietly laying my head back down to rest again.

* * *

Once again, I opened my eyes, not even sure what woke me up. I was much more alert this time, so my medicine must have been wearing off quickly.

"Ugh," I moaned, when I tried to move my legs, and winced at the muscles cramping in my thighs and my groin.

"So when's the doctor supposed to come back?" I looked over at Alex to make sure she was still there. She was spacing out and jumped a little and looked over at me like she just returned to Earth or something.

"I'm not sure, probably in a few minutes or something," she said and shrugged.

As she was talking I lifted the sheet off me, to see why my legs hurt so much. There was all this brownish red stuff caked to the inside of my legs and my fingers were all brown and crusty.

"What the hell-"

The doctor walked in. "Summer, we decided we would wait until you woke up. The nurse will come in a few hours to give you a sponge bath and wash your hair. But first, we need to have a talk about what happened the other night."

"Okay," I said confused, not knowing what to say.

"Well, Summer, lets start with when you were at the Baitshop, sitting at the bar. Or we can start earlier than that if you feel it's necessary."

"Well," I tried to think, and jog my memory. My head was a little groggy even though my body had come back to life.

"My friends are gone for a couple weeks so I decided I wanted to get out of the house, and just stay at their place until they come back. I guess before me, they already had plans for a house sitter. So my best friend's boyfriend's old friend from somewhere not around here was going to stop by and say hi since he's never met me before."

"Okay," the doctor said writing things down. I looked at his name tag. It said "Dr. Klein, Psychotherapist, Ph.d."

_Whoa whoa whoa, why the fuck would I need a shrink to ask me about what Chris did? Why isn't a cop or a real doctor or someone asking me what happened? I'm not the one that needs help. I'm not the psycho. Chris is the psycho._

"Continue, Ms. Roberts," he said waiting for the long pause to end. I stopped rapidly looking side to side, around the room.

"He came over to visit, then later that day, he picked me up and took me to a concert."

"Okay, and how much sleep had you gotten the night before," he asked.

"I'm not sure how this has anything to do with it, but I slept just fine," I snapped.

"Okay, and while you were at home before the concert, or while you were there, did you happen to do any illegal drugs, that you can remember?"

"What?"

"Ms. Roberts, did you consume any illegal drugs while you were with Chris at the concert?" He said impatiently.

"No, of course not. I don't do drugs, I just drink a little."

_Hmm…**a little**?_

"Ms. Roberts, there were witnesses from the Baitshop that said you were snorting cocaine at the bar."

"What! I didn't do any drugs! I never do drugs!" I looked over for Alex's support but she wasn't there. Why did she have to leave at such a bad time. I needed her to help me convince the stupid doctor that I was only sitting there drinking with Chris. She knows. She was standing there the whole time!

"Ms. Roberts," he said, putting his hand on my arm, as I snagged it away from him angrily, "We contacted your friend Chris, and spoke to him…"

"He's not my fucking friend!" I blurted out, in tears of rage.

"Summer, you need to calm down. We're only trying to help you. We need to gather all of the information from you that we can," Dr. Klein said slowly. "Now, Chris explained the night to us saying that the two of you were at the Baitshop together at the concert, and that the two of you had done cocaine and ecstasy and that you became suddenly ill from an overdose. He suggested that it might be a good idea to put you in an institution to help you overcome your addictions."

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. I can't believe someone I thought was sincere would do this to me. Not only did he take something that wasn't his, he denied it and stuck me in a horrible situation that would destroy my life. I started crying uncontrollably, unable to form words to defend myself.

* * *

**Disclaimer: I do not own The OC or any of it's characters. I do own Chris.**

* * *


	4. Headlock

_

* * *

When they push, when they pull,  
__Tell me, can you hold on?  
__When they say you should change,  
__Can you lift your head high and stay strong?  
__Will you give up, give in,  
__When your hearts crying out 'that is wrong'?  
__Will you love you for you,  
__At the end of it all?  
__In life, there's gonna be times when you're feeling low  
__And in your mind, insecurities seem to take control  
__We start to look outside ourselves  
__For acceptance and approval…_

-Christina Aguilera

* * *

**Headlock**

**-Alex-**

When Summer woke up and the doctor came in to talk to her about the other night, a different doctor pulled me aside. I wanted to stay in the room with Summer but I guess they had information to tell me about her condition because I was a 'relative'.

Some man in white clothing walked up and shook my hand. They all look the same and this hospital is making me feel like I'm gonna blow chunks.

"Ms. Kelly, you were here when we were examining Summer while she was still in a coma. The results have just recently arrived."

"Oh okay?" I said anticipating the answers, and I felt my fingers start to twitch a little bit.

"Well, we did a rape kit for her and there were no signs that showed resistance of penetration, and we tested for any sexual assault chemical assistance and the test did not come up positive, which may have been because her alcohol level in her blood was incredibly high. My co-workers also examined her bruises and head injuries which they believe are consistent with falling and stumbling in her bathroom. We think that she may have fallen and hit her head on the toilet or the sink when she lost consciousness."

At first I thought I imagined what the doctor was saying. "What? No no no," I said shaking my head, "How could there be resistance if she was drugged with something that is supposed to paralyze the victim for hours! And does falling and hitting her head form bruises inside her legs and internal bleeding!" I was screaming at the top of my lungs swinging my arms in the air and a couple men came up behind me holding my arms motioning me toward the exit.

_Dammit, I've gotta get back in here to find out what the hell these stupid doctors are thinking._

After a couple of hours I calmed down and cooled off, so I walked into the elevator, up the stairs and back toward her room, which was no longer the E.R. She was still hooked up to an IV though.

I walked in and luckily the room was empty so I didn't get stopped.

"Alex!" Summer said relieved, finally having someone she knew with her.

"Hi, don't worry Summer, I'll find a way to get you the hell out of here. These doctors are insane. They think you're making the entire thing up! They would have detected the chemicals he drugged you with if you hadn't had so much to drink apparently."

"My dad is coming here soon because the hospital called him so I guess Julie's coming with him too. So watch out, I wasn't sure if you'd want to be here."

"Well I think she likes me though. Right before Marissa and I broke up, Julie said I seemed nice. So maybe I'm on her good side. I just hope she doesn't blame me for what happened to you. She likes to blame people. Don't forget, she blamed Ryan when Marissa OD'd in Mexico. Yeah…she told me about that one…"

Speak of the _devil_, there walked in Julie and Dr. Roberts. They stood by her side, as the doctor returned to speak to them about what happened. I sat in the corner but listened closely.

Dr. Klein stood on the other side of Summer's bed facing the two of them, and said, "I and the rest of my staff would like to inform you that we think Summer may have an addiction to illegal substances, and we strongly suggest you send her to a rehab center that will reach the core of the problem and make her stronger so she can overcome that problem…"

"No Dad don't let them send me there! I didn't do that! You know I don't do that stuff!"

Dr. Roberts looked down at his daughter with a concerned look on his face, shook his head, and looked back up at the doctor, waiting for more information. This is making me sick.

Summer started shaking and screaming and looked like she was going to attack the doctor. A bunch of nurses ran in and held her arms and legs down, another holding her head against the bed and then the rest of them connected the straps down across all her limbs so she couldn't move. All she could do was lay there wiggling and screaming, trying to get her father's attention.

"Oh my goodness I can't stand to watch this any longer, I'm going to get some air," Julie said running her hand through her hair. Good lord, get over yourself, woman.

I guess the doctors, nurses, and Summer's Dad took off to discuss it all elsewhere to see if Summer would calm down. I just sat there and looked at Summer, and then all of a sudden she just passed out, probably from the stress.

My eyes filled up with tears so I left the room to get some air too.

* * *

**-Summer-**

I woke up and just lay there strapped down. I didn't bother screaming because I'd lost my voice and no one stayed in the room with me anyway. I looked back and forth trying to see if Alex was still here but she wasn't. I didn't move, just stared into space for a while thinking everything over.

_How am I going to get out of here? Why doesn't anyone believe me?_

The hall outside my room cleared for a while, as I watched all the doctors focus their attention on a beeping heart monitor at the end of the hall somewhere. I saw someone walking by looking back and forth as if they were lost. He turned and looked at me and my body froze up, my eyes widening. It was Chris.

I tried to yell, "Why are you here! What the hell are you doing here!" My yells were about as loud as whispers.

He walked in slowly, trying to keep a straight face, and sat down in the chair next to me.

"I came to talk about what happened the other night after the concert. I wanted to make sure there's no hard feelings…"

I continued shaking, causing my bed to roll a couple inches left and right. I was still strapped down, otherwise I would have attacked him.

"He stood up and firmly held his hand down over my mouth as I struggled and he pulled an object out of his pocket. He opened a syringe and filled it with air.

"You can keep a secret right? I mean, I wouldn't want to get in trouble just because you changed your mind." "Well," he chuckled, "I suppose now you don't have much of a choice, right?"

He kept his hand firmly over my mouth and punctured my IV bag with the needle and pushed all of the air into it, leaving a quarter-sized air bubble in it.

I continued to scream as loud as I could, eventually letting no noise come out. He kept his hand there still, while I was shaking violently trying to kick my legs around and watched the bubble move closer and closer to the bottom corner of the IV bag. He kept looking back and forth from the IV to my bed straps to the door to make sure no one was coming.

I watched as the air bubble traveled out of the IV bag through the tube down into my arm. My chest tightened and I heard nothing, saw nothing, and felt nothing. Only dark.

* * *

**Disclaimer: I do not own The OC or any of its characters. I do own Chris. The song lyrics are "Soar" by Christina Aguilera. She owns the song.

* * *

**


	5. How To Save a Life

**

* * *

****A/N: I want to change the title of the entire story but I really can't think of one! I'll think about it later, but I might end up changing it anyway. It depends on how I end it. It's still got plenty of chapters before the end but I'm still trying to choose between two different ideas I have for the ending! Also, this is a very short chapter, mainly because the next one needs to be by itself. I'll try to make the next one longer.**

* * *

**How To Save a Life**

**-Alex-**

I walked all the way down the stairs so I wasn't stuck in the elevator with the parents or anything. I walked not thinking about where I was going, just walking. Thinking about Summer and how I could try to get her out of here. I'm the only one allowed in the room other than her Dad because she has no siblings. She's already been here for days, so she really needs to leave. Staying here is making everything much more difficult on her. What she needs is to go home and relax.

I stood there fidgeting, then took my phone out of my purse. I flipped it open and just stared at it.

I gasped. _I have an idea. But it would require a ruined vacation. Worth it._

It started ringing and Marissa picked up. "Hi, who's this?"

"Hi…Marissa…this is Alex. I know it's weird that I'm calling you but it's really important, so you really have to listen. Something happened a few days ago and Summer really needs the three of you to come back down and be here as soon as you can."

"Oh no, okay, we'll be there as soon as you can. We won't drive, we'll fly instead."

"Okay, you really need to hurry. It's so important."

"Okay I'll call you when we're close to the hospital."

"Hey Marissa?"

"Yeah?"

"I need you to bring Luke too."

"Um…okay…"

"Just do it, okay?"

"Alright."

I hung up, put my phone away, and looked up. A familiar guy speed-walked right by me.

"Hey wait a minute! Get back here! Chris! Is that you! Come back!"

He jumped in his car and screeched away yet again.

_What the hell was he here for? Oh my God SUMMER! She's by herself!_

I ran back in through the hospital doors, down the hall and took the stairs, not wanting to wait for the slow elevator. I ran down the halls again stopping myself from hitting the walls on sharp turns, holding my arms out in front of me screaming "Someone please help, hurry!"

I ran into her room and she was unconscious, shaking, her heart monitor beeping like crazy and her EKG was shooting up tall mountains.

I screamed as I ran back out of her room calling the doctors saying something was wrong and that someone was in here.

As her EKG went flat, one of the doctors pulled out the defribulator, placing the paddles on both sides of Summer's chest, pressing the button, sending her torso up in the air about half a foot off her bed. They did this 3 times, and finally the heart monitor started beeping and the EKG was no longer flat. Her heart was pumping slowly but surely. I stood there shaking, wishing I knew where Chris was right now, so I could beat the shit out of him.

* * *

Four hours later, Summer was a little more stable and awake enough to talk to me. The doctor came in and gave me a strange look, glancing back and forth from me to Summer. 

"I'm going to have to ask you to leave. Every time you're in here, something seems to somehow go wrong. No one was even around when she went unconscious and nearly lost her life. Do you have an explanation for that?"

"I WAS OUTSIDE! YOU WEREN'T EVEN PAYING ATTENTION! How could you have even seen if anyone came into her room to hurt her if you were all down the hall? How do twenty nurses all stay in the same fucking room!"

Again, a couple men held me by my arms and escorted me all the way out of the hospital's front doors this time, asking me not to come back in again.

_Oh shit_. I dialed Marissa's number just as she, Ryan, Seth and Luke pulled up, jumping out of the SUV.

* * *

**Disclaimer: I do not own The OC or any of its characters. I do own Chris.**

* * *


	6. Hide and Seek

**A/N: Sorry about the really short chapter again guys! That's just how it ended up! I'll try to update soon though:o)

* * *

****Hide and Seek**

**-Marissa-**

The four of us jumped out of the car and my phone rang but it was just Alex anyway. She looked really worried and anxious. We all ran over to her.

"Okay, something happened to Summer. I'm not explaining it now, it'll take too long. The point is that they think she's crazy now and they're going to end up sending her away. But these doctors are insane, they don't make any sense and they're pissing me off."

"So why do I have to be here?" Luke said like he actually had something better to do, off somewhere with his gay dad.

"Listen," Alex said quietly, "I'm not allowed to go back up there, and only Marissa will be allowed in her actual room because she's considered family now. So, we need a way to get her out of here, without me going all the way upstairs to her room."

Seth scratched his head and said, "Well I remember an idea we had from the past, ya know, when summer dressed up as a Candy Striper so we could kidnap Marissa from her mother and the looney bin?"

Alex rolled her eyes and said, "Ya know what Seth? I think you just gave me a great idea."

* * *

I was standing there in the lobby with Alex, outside the men's room when Luke, Ryan, and Seth walked out in tight, short pink and white striped dresses and curly wigs. Seth was standing there moving his hips back and forth, putting his hands on them. He had a curly brown wig, his face covered in really poorly done makeup.

"Um, why didn't we do their makeup for them?" I asked.

"Yeah, I forgot about that part," Alex said laughing at them.

Luke's arms were really hairy. Thank God his legs were covered with pantyhose. Well there are some really manly looking nurses at this place. I think he'll get away with it.

"Alright, I'm going to stay down here and Marissa is going up to Summer's room to talk with her until the doctors clear out of the area," Alex said carefully.

The three guys followed behind me up the elevator and down the hall, each pushing little carts with food trays and tissues on them. I think Seth was the best actor. Well, he doesn't have to do much acting.

I looked behind me to make sure they were still there. Ryan and Luke rolled their eyes at me, but of course, Seth was walking like he was on a runway or something, batting his eyelashes and looking around.

We walked into Summer's room and I saw her laying there doing nothing. She was just staring. She looked all pale and grey like something was really making her sick. I sat down in the chair next to her, while the guys acted like they were busy doing something.

"Hey Sum, how are you feeling?"

"Not so good, I want to leave."

"I know you do, that's why we're getting you out of here."

"That's funny, I'm the one that warned you about not wanting to kidnap you from the hospital again," she said smiling weakly. I chuckled and pulled my chair closer.

"Okay, listen, see those nurses over there?"

"Ew why do we have gorilla nurses? Well except for that one, she just looks like an anorexic monkey!" She mumbled, not recognizing them.

"Well, those are your friends? They're going to help you get out of here?..." I said raising an eyebrow.

"Oh! HA! I always knew Seth would end up in a dress some day!"

"Okay okay, we have to be serious and think about how we're gonna do this," I tried to say quietly, my voice shaking because I tried not to laugh.

As we were whispering the doctor walked in. "Hi. Family members only."

"I'm her sister."

"Alright then."

He walked out of the room and down the hall. Our lovely candy stripers walked in with a stretcher bed looking thing and put it next to Summer.

"I'm not so sure candy stripers are supposed to move patients. Aren't the nurses supposed to be doing that?" I asked nervously.

"No, when I was doing community service here, I just did whatever the nurses told me to. I did move patients a couple of times. It's fine as long as they aren't in intensive care or something," Summer said assuredly.

I walked behind the guys who were quickly moving the rolling bed into the elevator to make it look like she was just switching floors. We still had her IV hooked up to her arm, so I had to push it next to her the whole way.

We got close to the front door, when someone finally noticed that a patient isn't anywhere near any actual rooms.

"Hey! Where are you going! You volunteers never know what you're doing! You're not even taking her in the right direction!" The woman at the desk shouted.

Ryan panicked and thinking quickly, he ripped the tape off Summer's wrist, quickly pulling out the IV.

"OW YOU ASSHOLE!" she screamed holding her wrist, which was bleeding some watery blood.

"Sorry, did you really wanna run away with an IV connected to you?" Ryan mumbled through his teeth.

Summer lifted herself up out of bed, holding her head. She must have gotten dizzy or something. So Luke held her left arm as she ran in front of us all barefoot out to the SUV, and we pulled away as fast as we could.

Seth mumbled something then said, "Wait, did we forget something?"

I slammed on the brakes and turned around to go back and get Alex.

* * *

**Disclaimer: I do not own The OC or any of its characters.

* * *

**


	7. Shattered

**Shattered**

**-Summer-**

So we grabbed Alex, as like 20 frickin' fat nurses ran out the front doors of the hospital, with their boobs flying all over the place, as they screamed "Come back!" in opera-like voices.

I was stuck in the back seat, and everyone was looking at me because I was squished between Seth and Luke. This is so uncomfortable. Especially with Seth staring at me while he's wearing mascara. It's just so wrong on many levels.

"Well, I have more bad news Summer," Alex said, turning around pushing Ryan's head out of the way. "

"Great, I need more of that," I said resting my head back on the seat.

"Well, I guess the doctors talked to your parents again and they were planning on sending you to an institution next week and that you have some kind of condition. Like something where a person constantly tries to get attention, then they regret it once they have it. Then I heard Julie say something about you being that way since you were like in elementary school."

"Okay, how does Julie get to have any say in my life or my personality when she's only known me as long as she's known my father! I really don't know what the fuck my dad sees in that slut!"

Luke looked at me and shrugged. "Well, you see, her ass is perfectly-"

"AHH STOP RIGHT THERE PLEASE DEAR LORD!" I shook my head, covered my ears with both my hands doing that "not listening not listening" thing we did when we were like ten.

Marissa took her right hand off the wheel, and formed the shape of a gun against her head. "POW."

The guys laughed.

* * *

We finally got to my place. My dad didn't know I was missing yet, and he wouldn't know for a few days because he's off on some business trip. Honestly, I've never even known why a doctor would have to go on business trips.

Well, I was sure that I was feeling a whole lot better just being outside the walls of that stupid sterile hell. So I denied Alex's offer to stay with me over night, just to make sure everything would be alright. She said the doctor warned that after experiencing a certain amount of trauma, depression is a risky factor. Especially if a victim isn't being watched over for a little while. I'm sure I'm fine.

* * *

I sat on the couch in the dark with my arms wrapped around my legs which were folded up in front of me covering my chest. I rested my chin on my knees. There was nothing good on TV and I felt scared for no reason.

_You're losing it again. _

I started thinking about the past few days and my heart sunk further and further down inside me. I thought back to the start. How I know it was my fault. I knew I shouldn't have offered for him to stay with me after the concert. If I hadn't offered then I wouldn't have had to change my mind. If I hadn't changed my mind then none of this would have happened to me. I shouldn't have had so much to drink. And I shouldn't have hung out with someone from Chino in the first place.

I started rocking back and forth getting lost in my thoughts which were only punishing me. I began to feel sick again. I stood up to walk down the hall and just lay in bed. Sleeping usually makes my nausea go away the fastest.

_Just call Alex._

As I walked by I walked into the bathroom because I thought I was going to throw up. I turned on the light and looked at my reflection in the mirror. I just stood there crying, not moving.

_I miss Seth. I miss being touched. I hate being touched. It hurts too much. I miss being loved. I miss myself. I'm not me anymore. I hate my reflection. I'm sick of staring at someone else's face. I'm not her. I don't want to be her anymore!_

I filled with an emotion I hardly recognized and took three steps forward crying out loud. I lifted my right hand, balled it into a fist and punched the mirror. It left one thin crack from the bottom corner to the top. I screamed at the top of my lungs and took another swing.

_Another. Another. The pieces fell. The pieces of myself I never wanted to see. The part of myself I wanted to go away._

_There was no more mirror. There was no more pain. Only the drops of my heart dripping down on my feet._

I stepped back and forth trying to regain my balance. I felt my knees shaking. I was floating. I was falling.

_I've been looking in the mirror for so long  
That I've come to believe my soul's on the other side  
All the little pieces fallen, shattered  
Shards of me  
Too sharp to put back together  
Too small to matter, But big enough to cut me into so many little pieces  
If I try to touch her  
And I bleed  
I bleed  
And I breathe  
I breathe no more_

_Take a breath and I try to draw from my spirit's well  
Yet again you refuse to drink like a stubborn child  
Lie to me  
Convince me that I've been sick forever  
And all of this  
Will make sense when I get better  
But I know the difference  
Between myself and my reflection  
I just cant help but to wonder  
Which of us do you love_

_So I bleed…I bleed…and I breathe…bleed…I bleed…and I breathe…I breathe…I breathe…I breathe no more._

* * *

**Disclaimer: I do not own the OC or any of its characters. I do own Chris. The song is "Breathe No More" by Amy Lee, written by Ben Moody. They own the song.**

* * *


	8. Uninvited

**Uninvited**

**-Alex-**

"Yeah I knew him, he was a nice guy, I don't really remember what he looks like though."

"He's got spiked dark brown hair and deep green eyes. Sort of attractive but when you don't know him he looks like he's up to something. So I kept staring when I was serving people drinks."

"Well, Ryan used to hang out with him all the time. He was a good kid, like Ryan, but like every kid growing up in Chino, like myself, he used getting into trouble as entertainment. I mean, it's only because there was nothing else to do."

"Yeah, but then what does he have against girls, that he has to feel powerful over them? And on top of it, all the adults believe him. Listen, he's going to get away with this!"

"Well, don't worry, I believe you, even though some tough guys turn out to be with good intentions, guys from Chino usually can't be trusted."

He smiled and pointed his finger at himself and laughed.

"Yeah well, you can be great when you _want_ to…" I glared at him.

He laughed, "Yeah I know. Well you let me know as soon as you need any help with the situation."

"I'm sure I'll be doing that soon," I said as I picked up my purse and opened the door. "I'm gonna go check up on her right now, see how her night alone went."

I kissed Trey goodbye and walked out to my car.

* * *

I pulled into Summer's driveway, got outta the car looking around to make sure no one had been there. I knocked on the door and no one said anything.

_Come on Summer, it's not early, open the door please please…_

Still no answer.

I started to get nervous. "C'mon open up! It's me, Alex!"

I didn't hear a thing.

_Great, what am I supposed to do now?_

I pulled a clip out of my hair and stuck it in the lock, wiggling it around.

_Dammit. C'mon open open._

Frustrated, I opened my phone and dialed Trey's number. He picked up on the first ring.

"Heyyy, whatsup?"

"Trey, I need you to come down to your old apartment. Well _our_ old apartment. I need help getting in here."

"Why do you have to break in?"

"Because I know something's wrong. I can just feel it. I've knocked a lot and yelled her name and she still hasn't answered."

"Well, don't wake her up! What if she's still trying to sleep? She's gotta be tired after all this drama she's gone through!"

"Trey, it's 1 in the afternoon!" I shouted getting annoyed. "Just get here soon. PLEASE"

"Okay okay, be there in 5."

I hung up.

* * *

I heard Trey's loud ass motor from all the way down the street and watched him speed up into the driveway. He got out of his car, and I joined him as he walked up to the door. He was carrying this little box of screwdriver looking things. He pulled one out and it didn't fit in the lock so he put it back and got a smaller one. He stuck it in the lock and turned it slowly with his eye up close to the whole.

_Click click._

I sighed with relief. "Wait here, I'll go check. She might freak out if she's fine and Trey Atwood is suddenly in her apartment."

He shrugged.

I walked in and down the hall to the bedroom. I saw a tall figure moving around underneath the sheets. A head popped out from underneath the sheets and a girl sceamed.

"OH MY GOD! I'm so so sorry to bother you! I forgot that you guys were back in here and that Summer was back at home! IM SORRY IM SORRY!"

As I ran out laughing my ass off, Ryan through a pillow and it hit me in the head.

Wow. That was the dumbest thing I've ever done in my life.

And then it kicked in that I'll be scarred for life after seeing my boyfriend's brother screwing my x-girlfriend.

I walked out of the apartment laughing with my head on my forehead.

"What the hell was that all about," Trey said, his face all twisted in confusion.

"Ahh..well you see, I forgot that since they came back from Mexico to help me get Summer out of the hospital, that would mean she wouldn't be living here anymore. She's at home. So I kinda just walked in on your brother and Marissa in the middle of…things."

"Wow! Good thing you didn't let me go in! Because I know neither of them ever want to see me again after, you know…" Trey put on a guilty face.

"Yeah, okay, sorry to drag you all the way out here. You can go home. I'll just go visit Summer at her house now and see you when I get home."

"Okay, see ya then." He kissed me on the forehead.

He got into his car and started pulling away and out of the corner of my eye I saw Ryan peeking through the blinds in the window, just glaring at me.

_Oops, they kind of don't know I'm with Trey._

* * *

**Disclaimer: I do not own The OC or any of its characters. I do own Chris.**

* * *


	9. Carry Me Home

**Carry Me Home**

**-Alex-**

So trying to forget about how stupid I am, I figured, okay, now I should probably visit Summer where she actually is.

I pulled up the long driveway, driving by water fountains and statues made of bushes carefully pruned. There were no cars at the house because her father was still on that business trip, and Summer's car was still sitting at Marissa's apartment from before she ever went to the hospital.

I walked up the front steps and knocked on the door, but there was no answer. I guess that happens when your house is so fucking big that you can't hear someone at the front door. I figured since Summer was all the way upstairs, she wouldn't even know I was here.

I put my hand on the door knob and turned it. Why the fuck do these filthy rich people leave their front doors unlocked all the time? It's like they're trying to say that they are so rich, they don't care if people steal all their expensive shit away from them!

I stepped into the front hall and closed the door behind me. I walked down the hall looking for stairs.

_Wow, I can't even find the second floor in this damn place._

Finally after five minutes of wandering around the first floor, I found a set of spiral, marble stairs leading up to a balcony. I quietly stepped across the balcony which showed over the family room, and was like a bridge leading to the other half of the second floor. I walked down the now carpeted hallway, peeking in each room to see which one was Summer's.

I looked in and there was a medium-sized pink room with a bed that had those curtain looking stupid princess drapes hanging over the top of it. Spoiled.

The bed was made and the sheets look untouched. So I kept walking.

I wandered all the way down the hall, which seemed to be a mile long. I walked by what looked like a small family room with a TV, a large stereo, and surround sound.

_Nope, not in there…_

As I walked by a few more rooms, I noticed light coming from what seemed like a bathroom. I reached the door and turned to my right to enter.

_Crunch._

_What the fuck?_

I looked down and my sandals were walking on shards of glass, that were crunching was I shifted my weight to each foot. I looked about six feet ahead and Summer was lying all mangled on the floor on top of a puddle of glass, her hands leaving small droplets of blood among the shattered pieces.

_No, not again._

I tiptoed over to her putting my right hand on her cheek and my left hand on her neck. Okay she has a pulse and she's still breathing. I stood up, pulled my phone out of my pocket and began to dial 9-1- _No, I can't let it happen again. I can't let her go back there. She'll only get worse. She needs to be with people. She needs someone there who really cares. _

I hung up the phone and put it away. I bent back down putting my right arm under the back of her neck and my left arm under the back of her knees, shaking and struggling to stand up as I lifted her.

I swiftly walked down the hall trying to watch her face and the space ahead of me at the same time. She must have fallen then slept there all night. Her right arm hung by her side, but her left held my shoulder, smearing blood across it. I didn't care.

I got downstairs and out the door, tiredly opening the back seat door and putting her down, pushing her body in a little farther until her feet reached the other door.

* * *

Pulling into the driveway at home, I ran to the door and pounded on it screaming. "Trey! Trey! Open up! Help me! I need help!"

I heard him run to the door and open it giving me a panicked look. We both ran to the car and opened the back doors. I grabbed under her arms and he pushed her legs, then ran to the other side to catch them as they slid out of the car.

We carefully carried her into the house and lay her down in the bathtub, where we washed the blood off of her body.

She must have been awake because she was moving her mouth and her closed eyes twitched a little.

We dried her off and lay her down on the couch in the living room. I ran over to pull the window shades down.

Trey walked back over, handing me a pair of tweezers.

"We have to pull the glass out of her skin. Otherwise she'll get infected."

I took the tweezers in my hand, and my eyes filled with water. I blinked out a few tears as the tweezers met with a shard of glass in her leg. I squeezed the end of the tweezers and pulled at the glass. The glass wasn't coming out. The glass was pulling her skin out and blood started to fill in around the glass, getting on the ends of the tweezers. I burst into tears and handed the tweezers to Trey.

"I can't do this!" I stood up and walked to the other side of the room and pulled up a shade to look out the window at the street.

"You have to kind of stick the tweezers down around the glass otherwise it will leave some of it in there."

"JUST DO IT." I snapped and then apologized.

"It's okay," he said frowning.

* * *

"Okay, I think I got it all," he said standing up and turning to look at me.

"Are you sure?"

"Pretty sure. If I missed anything, we'll notice the redness later once the rest start to heal. Come help me carry her to the bathroom, we've gotta clean her up again."

I walked over and she was covered in dime size spots of blood all over her legs, her lower back and her arms. But most of all, her fists were completely shredded, black and blue.

We lowered her into the bathtub filling it with warm water and I added some hydrogen peroxide. Trey kneeled next to the tub, hold her head up so she didn't sink in.

Tears started to slowly roll down Summer's cheeks, her eyes still closed.

* * *

Disclaimer: I do not own The OC or any of its characters. I do own Chris.

* * *


	10. Leave The Pieces

**Leave The Pieces**

**-Alex-**

Summer woke up lying on a big beach towel on the living room floor. She freaked out when she saw Trey but realized he wasn't doing anything wrong so she loosened up and lay down flat on the floor again.

"Why am I all wet?" she asked touching her legs and her arms.

"We had to clean you up after the temper tantrum you had in your bathroom," Trey said, and I gave him a dirty look.

"Oh," Summer said embarrassed. "My legs are stinging."

"Yeah, it'll get better. They'll start to get itchy though because they're healing quickly."

Summer turned to lie on her side instead and folded half of the towel up over the side of her naked body that was facing Trey.

"It's okay, I'm not looking," Trey said and turned his head away a little.

"He's the one that had to pick all the little pieces of glass out of you," I said defending the fact that Trey saw Summer naked.

"Thanks."

Trey walked into the dining room and picked up Summer's bag that Seth dropped of to me the day we stole her from the hospital. He unzipped it and started pulling out some comfortable clothes for her to put on. She was dry by now. Summer slowly stood up wrapping the towel completely around her body, and Trey handed her the clothes. She walked into the bathroom to get dressed.

* * *

We spent the rest of the day in the house doing things because Summer was too ashamed to go out in public. At least only her closest friends knew what was going on. She was also afraid she would run into Chris. I was afraid of that too. Especially since he managed to hurt her again the second I take my eyes off her. I wish I never got kicked out of her room. Then I would have been there to kick his ass when he showed up. 

We were in the middle of watching a movie, Summer sitting in between me and Trey, not even looking at the screen. She was staring at the floor off to the side. I kept glancing at her eyes momentarily.

"I was finally able to tell Marissa what happened," Summer said over the movie, quietly.

"That's a good thing," Trey said. "She's your best friend. She was waiting for you to open up."

I looked over at the front windows when I saw the shining of headlights and a car that came screeching to a stop. I jumped out of my seat.

"Who the hell shows up to visit at fucking midnight!" Trey shouted waving his arms.

"Summer please go in the back," I said nervously, just in case it was somehow Chris. I don't know how he would have found it.

There was no knock. The door flew open and all of a sudden Ryan storms in and walks up to Trey. He grabbed Trey by the arm right under his shoulder and started pulling and dragging him toward the door.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing!" I screamed backing up, not wanting to get hurt.

"You're coming with me," Ryan said through his teeth looking at Trey as he continued to pull him toward the door.

I heard a car door shut, and Ryan came back to the door and looked at me.

"Marissa told me what happened."

* * *

**-Trey-**

Ryan jumped in, put his seatbelt on and slammed the pedal to the floor. He drove about 90 all the way to the highway.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Ryan said, pulsating.

"I was afraid to talk to either you or Marissa after what happened last year," I confessed, looking out my window.

"I don't care! You know how those guys are. I don't care if he was our friend. Trey, he's from Chino. What kind of guys come from Chino, Trey!"

I flinched, he was yelling in my face so loud.

"Ryan, watch the road please."

He looked forward and had to swerve to pass a car that stopped in our lane of travel.

"We're going to take care of this right now."

"How are we supposed to take care of it Ry? Turn him in? He already gave a statement. Everyone believes him."

Ryan turned to me with a straight face. "That wasn't exactly my plan.

* * *

Ryan pulled into a thin driveway, among very close houses, with small shoddy picket fences. 

We both got out of the car and I followed behind him as he walked fast to the door pounding on it with his fist.

Chris opened the door.

"Hey Ryan! Long time no see! How ya doin-"

Ryan lunged at him mid-sentence slamming him hard to the wood floor. None of the lights in Chris's place were on so we were left to fight in the dark.

I walked in and stood there motioning to move at them if Ryan was ever on the bottom. Eventually Chris slammed Ryan's head into a nightstand at the end of a couch so I picked up a lamp and smashed it on Chris's head and Chris fell to the floor. He looked up at me and crawled toward the desk, opened a drawer, and pulled out a 5 inch knife.

I looked down at Ryan laying only two feet away from Chris, holding his head in pain from hitting the corner of the hardwood piece of furniture.

"Ryan watch out!" I screamed just in time as Ryan rolled over and away, beginning to stand up just as Chris swung his arm and smashed the thick knife all the way through into the wood floor. He tried to pull it out and take another swing at Ryan but the knife was wedged between the planks too tightly.

So Chris got up and started to run at me shoving me hard up against the wall. Ryan came running up behind him and pulled him away as I slid down the wall, dizzy, sitting on the floor watching.

Ryan took him by the back of his collar, choking the front of his neck throwing him to the floor. There was a loud thud. Chris's movement was staggered and hesitant. Ryan picked up a nearby wooden chair and started hitting Chris's face with one of the hard legs.

_Whack, whack, whack, whack._

I watched the surrounding pool of blood expand and it beaded up across the wood.

"Ry, you better stop, he's bleeding a lot"

Ryan stopped and looked at Chris, just laying there, not moving. He bent down to feel the pulse in his neck. Ryan looked at me, his eyes getting wider.

"Go! Run!" Ryan screamed and we both ran out the door to his car.

* * *

**Disclaimer: I do not own The OC or any of its characters. I do own Chris. However, Chris is dead anyway. So you'd have a hard time stealing him.**

* * *


	11. Black Roses Red

**

* * *

****A/N: Only a few more chapters left! This will have a sequel, just in case you're wondering about unanswered questions:o)**

* * *

_Can I ask you a question please?  
__Promise you won't laugh at me  
__Honestly I'm standing here  
__Afraid I'll be betrayed  
__As twisted as it seems  
__I only fear love when it's in my dreams  
__So let in the morning light  
__And let the darkness fade away…  
__Can you turn my black roses red?  
__Drowning in my loneliness  
__How long must I hold my breath?  
__So much emptiness inside  
__I could fill the deepest sea  
__I reach to the sky  
__As the moon looks on  
__My one last tear has come and gone  
__Dying to let your love rain down on me  
__Can you turn my black roses red?_

* * *

**Black Roses Red**

**-Alex-**

Me and Summer sat there watching TV waiting to hear from Ryan or Trey. I still don't know what they were going out to do. But Trey better have his key because pretty soon I'm locking the door. It's already 3 in the morning and I have to get up and go to work for 9.

I stoodup and turned off the TV because Summer started falling asleep on the couch anyway. I locked the door and walked back over to Summer.

"Summer," I whispered, "Come on, you can sleep in the bed, this couch is really uncomfortable. If Trey even comes home tonight he can sleep here."

"Okay thanks," Summer mumbled all groggy. She stood up slowly and followed me to the bedroom.

I turned on the lamp next to the bed and we both got under the covers.

Summer was laying on Trey's side of the bed, the left side, and faced away from me with both of her hands under her pillow. I reached toward my night table and turned off the lamp.

Summer rolled over.

"You okay?" I whispered.

"I guess."

"Okay. Goodnight."

"Alex?"

"Yeah?"

"Have you ever heard how you have to experience pain to know what happiness is?"

"Yeah. It's very true."

"Well…what happens if you feel so much pain for so long that you forget happiness even exists?"

I just looked at her and didn't say anything.

She rolled back over too close to me so my nose was touching her hair a little. I put my left arm over her hip, just resting it there. We were both silent.

* * *

I woke up about two hours later and then couldn't fall back asleep. I was still in the same exact position I was before I fell asleep. 

_How is she letting me even touch her like this? Wouldn't she want people to stay away from her body? I suppose she's still asleep._

I don't know why but I slowly pulled her a little closer with my left arm. She didn't move or react to it at all. Wow she must be really deep into sleep.

* * *

**-Summer-**

I've been laying here up against Alex for hours and I still haven't been able to fall back asleep since I left the couch. I have no idea why. I'm just laying here, my mind tangled in static. I can't calm down my thoughts.

_But I'm warm. I'm comfortable. I don't feel lost. But why am I too distracted to even fall asleep?_

I continued to think. Thinking about the way I've been around Alex since she found me after Chris left. Thinking about how she hardly ever left me. How she risked her life defending me and just being around me. She could have been arrested in the hospital. Twice. She carried me, she cleaned me, protected me and genuinely cared. That's more than I can say even for Coop. I know Coop came home from her vacation early but she never even asked me what happened. And she never really talked to me about it. I told her because I needed to get it out. It didn't feel right keeping something from my best friend. I just hope she didn't tell anyone else. That could cause big problems. I can't press charges. No one believes me. He'll get away with it. Or worse, attack me for trying to turn him in.

_But Alex is here now. She's been here. She's holding me. I'm not afraid when I'm with her. She feels like home. _

Lying awake still, my eyes still shut, I felt her pull me closer. I pretended I was still asleep. I was waiting for something. I just didn't know what.

* * *

_I'm not afraid of anything  
__I just need to know that I can breathe  
__And I don't need much of anything  
__And suddenly,  
__I am small and the world is big  
__All around me is fast moving  
__Surrounded by so many things  
__And suddenly,  
__How does it feel  
__To be different from me?  
__Are we the same?  
__How does it feel  
__To be different from me?  
__Are we the same?  
__How does it feel?  
__I am young and I am free  
__But I get tired and I get weak  
__I get lost and I can't sleep  
__But suddenly,  
__How does it feel  
__To be different from me?  
__Are we the same?  
__How does it feel  
__To be different from me?  
__Are we the same?  
__How does it feel?  
__Would you cry  
__With me here?  
__How does it feel?_

* * *

**Disclaimer: I do not own The OC or any of its characters. I do own Chris. The songs are "Black Roses Red" by Alana Grace and "How Does It Feel" by Avril Lavigne. They own the songs**.

* * *


	12. One Moment More

**One Moment More**

**-Alex-**

I woke up and looked past Summer's head at the alarm clock that I was too busy being curious to set last night. Therefore, I was already late for work about three hours ago. Oh well. I'm my own boss anyway.

But I really should get up and go because it'll look really bad in front of my employees. I wish I could just stay here a few more minutes.

When I became fully awake I looked down at where my hand was and my eyes widened because somehow while I was sleeping my hand was underneath the elastic waste of her sweatpants, just in front of her left hip.

_Oh God oh God, what am I supposed to do? What if she wakes up and sees this? What if I move and wake her up? I really don't remember putting my hand in there!_

After a minute I calmed down, starting to fall back asleep. It was a little chilly because the open window next to the bed was letting a breeze in, blowing the curtains up in the air.

_I really don't want to leave this bed._

I put my face back up against her hair. It smelled good. I wiggled my body up against her a little.

_Stop it. You're going to scare her. She's going to wake up while you're messing around._

* * *

**-Summer-**

I finally fell asleep a few hours ago wondering if Alex was actually supposed to be out of bed by now. But I just kept laying there because I was so comfortable. I have no reason to leave this bed. I have nothing to look forward too. Once Trey comes back I'll probably be on the couch.

The bedroom door opened. It was Trey, I could tell by the sound of his walk, and his breathing.

_Dammit. Don't make us get out of bed please. Don't wake Alex up._

All I could think about was that as soon as I get kicked out of this bed, I'll go back to missing Seth. Right now, I'm perfectly fine being Cohen-free. In this bed, I'm over him.

"Good Morning! Wow! You guys slept in? Hey hey hey, what? Am I being replaced?" Trey said smiling as he stretched his arms.

_Damn right. I'm taking her_, I thought. _Whoa, time to calm down. He saved you too._

"What time did you get home?" Alex asked, turning her head away from me.

"I just walked in. I figured I should just stay over Ryan's place and sleep on the couch so I didn't come home too late and wake you guys up."

"So how did that go?"

"It went fine. We'll talk about that later. SO! How was the end of that movie?"

"We didn't finish it because we started falling asleep on the couch. So I turned it off and we went to bed assuming you weren't coming home anytime soon."

"Oh, alright. Okay, well I'm gonna actually go back out," he said pointing to the bedroom door, "I gotta take care of something real quick with Ryan but I should be back later on."

"Okay, let me know if you're going to be here for dinner tonight."

"Alright, later," he said waving at me and walking back out the bedroom door.

I figured Alex would jump right out of bed since she had to go to work. But she didn't move. She might not even have noticed that I'm awake yet.

Anyhow, I felt her body move away from mine.

_Noooo…._

_Wow, why am I going so crazy for this? I'm confusing myself._

She reached her arm out, and I heard her pick up the phone and dial.

_Phew._

"Hi. Yeah it's me, Alex. I slept in today because I'm not feeling too well. I'm just going to stay home for the rest of the day and take care of things at work tomorrow. The next concert's not until five days from now anyway. Just get done as much as you can and I'll see you later. Yep, I will, bye."

Immediately after putting the phone back on the hook, she rolled over and was up against my back again. I felt a warm relief.

I looked down to watch her hand go toward it's original position. Her hand slowly moved toward my left hip. I watched as four of her fingers slowly slid under the elastic of my pants about four inches. She left them there, slowly spreading them out. Her hand was warm. I was so cold from the breeze coming through the window.

I closed my eyes and sighed. My legs started to cramp so I made a moaning noise pretend I was stretching in my sleep, and I separated my knees. I was laying on my side so straightened my separated legs for a minute and then started to bend them back the way they were. When I went to close them, Alex was in the middle of putting her left leg folded in between. My eyes widened with surprise. But I had to fight the urge to act back, otherwise she would know I was awake.

I heard her right hand move out from under her pillow and slide down underneath my right ribs, around to the front of my lower stomach. I felt her body slide in even closer, if that was possible.

_Don't move, don't make noise. _

I felt a rush of blood to my head.

_Does she know I'm awake? Either way, I'm not moving. I don't even know what to do…_

Her nose moved back and forth twice up trough my hair, rubbing the back of my head a little. I heard myself let out a shivering sigh, keeping my eyes shut.

Her nose lifted off my head and her body moved down an inch or two. Then I felt random wetness on the back of my neck.

_Is she kissing my neck! Oh god. Yep, that'd be a tongue. What do I do!_

It wasn't even awkward. I don't even swing this way. Well, it wouldn't be any surprise after sleeping with Seth Cohen, after all.

I just stayed there, still, waiting for what she would do next. I never want to get out of this bed.

_Am I enjoying this? Or am I just curious?_

This would be bad if Trey walked in.

* * *

**Disclaimer: I do not own The OC or any of its characters.**

* * *


	13. Perfect

**A/N: WARNING—this chapter contains explicit content and sexual images that may not be suitable for readers under 17. Femslash.**

* * *

_I'd wake up, and make love to you if I had you  
I would touch you so much, but I'm not allowed to  
What I hate is to wait, but in this case I'm patient  
I'm discreet, I'm not weak, I just need the moment  
She wants me, she wants me not  
I want everything she's got  
If I leaned over and tried to kiss you  
Would I be wrong, after so long to kiss you  
Would you pretend, we're only friends, if I kissed you  
At least I can dream of you in a scene, when I'd kiss you  
On one hand, we are friends, but still my mind wanders  
Through side streets and alleys, I just keep growing fonder  
To stop me is not easy, can't stop a lion from hunting  
I'm focused, I won't miss, there's no control of some things_

* * *

**Perfect**

**(Six Months Later)**

**-Summer-**

Alex and Trey broke up today because Alex was angry at Trey for being a suspect. I guess Chris was reported missing last week by the people he works with. The police found him dead in his own apartment. He was barely there though, believe me. Guess he wasn't missed enough to go looking for. On the news they said he became part of the wood or something. Alex let out a morbid laugh at that one.

Alex was talking to Trey yesterday, demanding to know what happened that night when Ryan pulled him out of the house. But Trey wouldn't talk to her. She just wanted him to be honest. She already knows Trey isn't perfect anyway. She wouldn't have gone out with him in the first place if she hated that. Alex and I talk all the time about what we think happened and we both have a feeling that they teamed up to take care of Chris. The court date is next month, and Trey insists to his lawyer that Ryan was not involved. Marissa's been lying for him too. She made up some excuse about them being at dinner with the Cohens or something.

I'm not happy that Alex broke up with Trey, because I'm sure he's not happy about it. But Alex seems fine. And she deserves someone more than Trey. She cares too much to be wasted on someone that moves from girl to girl every few weeks. Or for Marissa, it was guy to girl to guy.

I've been living in Alex's house for a couple months now. I suppose it's better that Alex and Trey are broken up because there are a lot of things that happened while Trey wasn't home. He definitely doesn't know about that. Hopefully he never will.

* * *

**-Flashback-**

-Alex-

Trey had just left for work and I had the weekend off so I decided that I'd hang out with Summer for the rest of the night, since we hadn't had a chance to after she permanently moved in. So we were up all night watching horror movies and we even played board games laughing at ourselves for being such dorks.

We were drinking some of those fruity alcoholic drinks, that way we would only get buzzed. Summer learned not to get so drunk anymore. I haven't though! But I figured I'd better not tempt her.

After the buzz went away we were both really tired so we decided just to go to bed and go to a carnival tomorrow. It's been a while since that night when we were really close because Trey's been home sleeping in the bed and Summer started using an air mattress she borrowed from Julie. It's funny, the parents never did find out about Summer escaping from the hospital. Guess she was too much trouble for the doctors. They didn't mind that she was gone.

So we headed into the bedroom and I got this strange feeling. I turned out the lights as if I were getting into bed right away. But instead, right when it got dark, I took off all my clothes. Well, except for my bra and underwear. I just chucked them into the corner of the room.

I slowly slipped under the covers, facing the other side of the bed. I felt the weight of Summer getting into bed too. I figured she was facing my way.

We were both laying there quiet and still for a few minutes.

"I'm bored now. I can't fall asleep," Summer whispered.

"Yeah, me too. Do you wanna just go and play another game?"

"Yeah lets play a game," I said not thinking. "How about we stay here and play it?"

She started laughing and I got up on my knees, putting them on either side of her waist and she rolled flat onto her back. We were both laughing hysterically. I was holding both her wrists in my right hand, poking her side, tickling her.

After we were both out of breath from wiggling around I finally just kind of fell over back into my sleeping spot, lying on my side, facing her. My eyes were finally used to the dark enough to at least see outlines of things.

Summer pulled the blankets back up to her neck, so I did the same. The sheets felt cool against my skin.

She slid over until she was right in front of me. I felt her hand glide across my stomach onto my lower back, as she started moving her upper body over me a little, keeping her legs still on the bed. Then our hips met. I was lying with my head flat on the pillow looking up as her head lowered and her lips met mine. Upon contact, I started having flashbacks about when I found her in Marissa's apartment and being with her at the hospital, then finding her again at home, and how we've been around each other since then. Not one time did I remember I have a boyfriend. It just never occurred to me. I was too caught up in the moment. And I still believe that if I had happened to think of him, it wouldn't have mattered.

I returned to the moment and felt her lips deeper, still light weight over me, as her tongue slowly swept across the inside of my upper lip. I we both exhaled slowly at the same time and I felt her warm breath on my cheeks.

Her lips left mine and she took a breath, connecting again right away. As she kissed me the second time I felt her hips start to move up against mine, our legs tangling, rubbing up against each other. Concentrating on her movements up against my body, I put both arms around her waist, my fingers slipping under each strap of her underwear, slowly pulling them down her legs. I couldn't reach any farther once they were down to her knees. I felt her moving to kick them down off her feet. Both my hands went from the back of her knees up to her hips and I moved them up past her ribs.

Then she separated her legs, putting them on each side of my stomach, lifting off of me an inch or two. She pressed her lips hard against mine when I slid my right hand all the way up the inside of her left leg, slowly moving my fingers back and forth between her legs. I removed my lips from hers and started kissing down her neck to her chest. Summer put her face in the pillow behind my head.

**-End Flashback-**

* * *

**-Summer-**

Ever since the first time with Alex, I've been dying inside because I knew I could never be with her. But now that Trey is moving out and moving on, I finally have a chance. And I know the chance is there because the feelings haven't faded. For either of us.

And every night before I fall asleep I wonder how miserable I would be right now, after just breaking up with Seth, if I hadn't found Alex. Or rather, If Alex hadn't found me. I'd be alone. I'd be unhappy. And Alex probably wouldn't be happy right now either. It's crazy because sometimes I get this feeling like I'm thankful that Chris raped me.

* * *

**-Flashback-**

He walked in slowly, trying to keep a straight face, and sat down in the chair next to me.

"I came to talk about what happened the other night after the concert. I wanted to make sure there were no hard feelings."

_Well Chris, I guess there are no hard feelings anymore. _

**-End Flashback-**

* * *

If Chris hadn't raped me, I'd still hardly know Alex. Alex wouldn't have had someone to save. We wouldn't have saved each other. I wouldn't have gotten over Seth. Ryan and Trey wouldn't be speaking to each other right now. And on top of it all, I've opened my eyes. I've learned to watch out for myself. They say everything happens for a reason. Sometimes you have to sacrifice yourself, to have good things come out of it. I've realized that the truth is, being happy doesn't mean everything in your life is perfect. Maybe it's about stringing together all the little things. Maybe we just get through it. And that's all we can ask for.

* * *

**Disclaimer: I do not own The OC or any of its characters. I do own Chris. The song is "Kiss You" by iiO. They own the song. The second to last sentence is a paraphrase from a quote I heard a long time ago. So I guess whoever said it owns it.**

* * *

**A/N: Well! I'm done! I know I wrote this quick and the chapters were pretty short but this was my first story so I hope at least someone likes it! I would love reviews, I'd like to hear lots of opinions! Thanks for reading my story. :o)**

* * *


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